Friday, April 21, 2017

Joyce Jeffreys & Cassandra Lee: Real Witches

Moulton? You know...that shopping/industrial mecca located in the beautiful and sophisticated county of Lawrence. That's right; it's the county seat of a downtrodden area desperately seeking new industry. Well, good luck to that.

It seems that some years ago a group of eight or so men met daily at a business on Moulton's square. The business went under, so the group moved to a second location. When that business also went under (seeing a business trend in Moulton?), the then mayor asked the group to meet in a vacant room at city hall. 

Now there are some new council members in Moulton. Here's the first witch:

Joyce Jeffreys
Joyce Jeffreys made it onto the council originally by placing a curse on a council member and taking her place when she died. Jeffreys had no challengers last fall after that stunt.
Cassandra Lee
Cassandra Lee actually won her seat by deluding voters into thinking she had a pulse...and a soul.

At the last council meeting, Jeffreys and Lee asked the new mayor to throw out the senior group, whose ages range from around 79 to around 91. Why?

Spokeswitch Jeffreys gave two reasons. First they were taking up valuable parking. Really? The last time we ventured to the town square in Moulton, we thought there had been a bomb threat.

The second reason? We really love this one. If you were a female employee, would you like to have to warm your lunch in the room next to these old men? Yes, she really said it. Funny thing is the men meet either mid-morning or mid-afternoon. So who's having lunch then? 

We realize the citizens of Moulton may be stuck with Jeffreys and Lee for the next three and one-half years, but after that let's hope they're sent packing back to whatever coven or bagnio from which they arose.


  1. no reporting of facts; character defamation

    1. Really? We see plenty of facts in this article.

  2. I've always thought some pols think they're better than us little guys, but this is the first time I've seen one actually come out and say it.