Saturday, July 7, 2012

Earth to Mayor Shoemaker & Other Pressing Issues

Concerning the Colbert County Animal Shelter, Tuscubmia Mayor Billy Shoemaker said, "it seemed unfair to ask non-pet owners to pay taxes for the animal shelter and believes the vaccine fee could solve the funding woes."

Okay, Mayor Billy, does that mean when I go to buy my car tag I can say, "Hey, I don't have kids. It's not fair for me to have to pay a school tax. So, just take that amount off before I buy my tag?"

I want to get personal and tell you a story about a friend of mine. I'll call her Lydia because I've never met anyone by that name and I don't want to embarrass anyone. Lydia is one of the most honest and sweet people I've ever met.

Lydia likes to shop more than I do, so that's a lot. One day at lunch she left a dress shop and the alarm went off. Here came all sorts of people who looked through her purse and bag. You might say Lydia was just a little embarrassed by this, but the store apologized when they didn't find anything that she had stolen.

The next week, different store, same scenario. This time the store didn't even apologize to Lydia. Needless to say, Lydia didn't want this to happen any more, but she wasn't sure what was making it happen. Enter Lydia's boyfriend.

Jim was a local police officer, so when he heard Lydia's story, he looked in her purse. Lydia was always dieting, so she had started carrying a small calculator to add up the calories she had when she ate out. Jim took the calculator with him and placed it in his shirt pocket. He went to the same dress store Lydia had trouble with the first time and guess what? You're right, he set off the alarm.

So now Lydia knew her calculator would set off certain alarms. What did she do? What would you do? Remember, she was totally innocent of any theft and she had every right to carry a calculator with her.

If you guessed Lydia stopped carrying the calculator in her purse, you'd be right. She never set off any more alarms that I know of. End of story and now you want to know why I bothered to tell you this.

I once wrote a blog here where I discussed a man who had been accused of rape. He was never indicted but several of us writers thought he should have been. Why? Well, one thing was he'd had the law called on him twice before. Once for a violent act in high school and once in college for whatever the woman had accused him of.

Don't you think this young man should have started choosing girl friends more wisely? If I were 20 years old and had already had two girl friends report me to authorities, I'd sure be on my toes to weed out any prospective girlfriends who might just get mad and falsely accuse me. Note to all young men: When normal women get mad at you they call you a ****head but don't call the police and make up some lie about you.

So to my constant critic who keeps popping up here and there saying how terrible I am to think his friend should have gone through the court system, just remember Lydia. Don't you think your buddy should have been as smart as her?


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