Today We Present: "King of the Field"

I tell you what, if Texas can keep Alabama from scoring, I'll give away free propane tanks. - Hank Hill

I believe in good sportsmanship in theory--that's not in practice, of course. - Peggy Hill

If we win, can I eat the elephant? - Bobby Hill

Aunt Peggy, is this lipstick crimson? I wouldn't want to wear the wrong color today. - Louanne Platter

I just put an upside down elephant on the truck. Classy, huh? - Dale Gribble

Shug, I don't think you can wear that Texas Alumni shirt unless you actually graduated, or at least attended some classes. - Nancy Gribble

Yhe, ol Tyxus gwon ter upt yep sho naf. - Jeff Boomhower

Hank, do you think it'd be okay if I sat on the Alabama side since they have prettier girls? - Bill Dautrieve


Good Luck, Alabama!