Sunday, April 10, 2011

The West Colbert Caper

Lured by the promise of big bucks, our hero drove down the dusty road. He'd heard Cherokee was a law officer's dream--nine dollars an hour and the chance to be shot in the line of duty with no medical insurance in sight. It didn't get any better than that for someone whose middle name was "Danger."

Arriving at the gritty town hall, the law man found plenty of empty parking spaces; could it be a trap? Slowly he exited his battered Peugot and walked toward the front was open. With a quick prayer he gave a push and stepped inside. His eyes rapidly adjusted to the dimmed light, allowing him to look around for the fabled head honcho--the Chuckanator. His heart raced as he discovered...nothing. The town hall was empty.

At least empty of people. There spread before him were office equipment and filing cabinets filled with who knew what. Amid the sensitive town documents, there was probably even a petty cash box, just no one in sight to tend them, to guard them from the evil that lurked on every street corner of the legendary town. Slowly, the would-be protector of the innocent backed out of the deserted office and concocted a plan...he would return in an hour when someone, anyone, would be here.

How long does an hour last in Cherokee? Only one who's been in the trenches can really appreciate the slow motion ticking of the clock, but the time finally arrived. He returned; he recreated his earlier attempt at finding employment in this fabled hub of law enforcement. What would await him?

Nothing. He found the same emptiness that had greeted him an hour before. He was utterly alone and he could have taken everything that wasn't locked down, including the toilet paper. He could have walked out unnoticed with his plunder and never looked back...but he just wasn't that kind of guy.

He couldn't promise that the next one to discover this easy mark would feel the same way...

The adjectives in the above tale may be over the top, but the story is true. Not only did our favorite Colbert County town make itself an easy mark, it lost the chance of a great police officer. Ah, malfeasance, thy name is Cherokee.


Remember Derek Warren Logue, the sex offender advocate from Sheffield who recently returned to the "mean streets of Cincinnati," as he called them? Logue who objected strenuously to our description of him as a sexual predator...since he had only one known victim and Alabama does not use a tiered system of designation for sexual offenders? Now back in Ohio, Derek has again been placed in their system. Many thanks to a watchdog for sending this link to us:

Derek W. Logue

Logue recently published a rant on the TimesDaily Forum against Sheffield Municipal Attorney Ben Gardner. Kudos to Mr. Gardner for whatever action elicited this response from a man who sexually assaulted an 11 year-old girl because she "was asking for it."

Related post: Sheffield: Sexual Predator Central