Thursday, March 11, 2010

Words (The New Political Language)


A Guest Commentary by

J. J. Ray

Well, it is that time again. Election season is upon us. For all of you that are watching the goings on in Washington you will discover there is a new language out there. I call it politicaleze, not to be confused with salesmaneze or lawyereze. Although they are similar, they are not quite the same. If anyone has ever bought a car you will be familiar with salesmaneze, or if you have any dealings with insurance salesperson then you have been exposed. Attorney’s primarily use Lawyereze until they are elected. Then the legislature infection takes over.

Congress speaks a combination of all three. I believe that when they are elected all those promises that they made somehow got lost inside their heads and then that new language and virus, Congresseze takes over. This language infects that part of the brain than controls speech and truth. Most politicians are infected with it, there is no cure or vaccine only the termination of their position will cure it.

Now, do not confuse these new languages with mediaeaze because that one is a pure dialect. There is left-winger, right-winger, centrist, liberal, bleeding heart liberal, populist, moderate, social democrat, blue-dog democrat, Regannite, birther, progressive and the old standbys republican and democrat. Oh, the new one, tea partier almost forgot that one. How can a democrat or republican become all or part of these designations? I thought we had a two party system.

The President is such a good polyglot he is able to combine all the languages and roll them into Presidenteze. Presidenteze however, comes with a special infection commonly referred to as selective hearing and fractional amnesia.

Some in congress are prone to that selective infection but the media in most cases have a cure for it. Apparently the President welcomes the selective virus as he does not hear the will of people when they tell him no and forgets all those promises he made when he was campaigning. I have heard it said that some women also have the selective virus. Personally, I would never allude to it for reasons of personal safety.

In November of this year, I believe those that are infected with congresseze will get an antibiotic and then they will be cured. Maybe part of that will rub off on the president. Next time we will get precise definitions of the new Media language and learn the proper way to discern it.

The countdown is on: For Tuscumbia Mayor Shoemaker to decide the fate of Police Chief Tony Logan. The voters of Tuscumbia are waiting...