Sunday, September 13, 2009

Nothing Says Priorities Like Dragon Ladies

We invite everyone to visit the Shoals to enjoy the area's unique shopping and dining experiences. Want to take in an IMAX film while in the area? Well...okay, maybe we don't have that, but there's so much shopping. Oh...well, maybe most of that is at Target or Wal-Mart, but there's all the wonderful restaurants in the area. You can't say there's not a MacDonald's or a Hardee's on every corner in the Shoals.

Uh...this wasn't what you had in mind? Okay, you got us, the Shoals isn't exactly a tourist mecca in several areas, but do we have it made in the fake acrylic nail department. No, we in the Shoals may not want to shell out those big bucks for a gourmet meal or an Omega watch (What? You didn't know Mefford's Jewelers stopped carrying this line last year?), but we certainly know how to do artificial nails good and fancy. Just look at the newest addition to Regency Square Mall. How have we managed all these years without a 2,400 sq.ft. nail emporium? There are just some new businesses you don't have to worry about surviving.

Correction: Joey Rushing tells us the rape trial of Angus Eledge will be held in Lauderdale County. While the six year-old victim is a resident of Franklin County, the crime took place in Lauderdale. We know that due to the age of the victim, a plea bargain may be in her best interest as well as Eledge's; however, we hope Chris Connolly will request a maximum sentence in this particularly heinous crime.