Saturday, August 23, 2025

Rescue at Martin Park

 

Gemini



The following is a very fictionalized account of true events...

Operator: Lauderdale 911. Please state the nature of your emergency.

Victim: I'm having a heart attack. I...I need help.

O: Stay calm, sir. What is your location?

V: I'm in Martin Park. About half the way down the walking trail.

O: Martin Luther King Park in Leighton? I'll transfer you to Colbert 911.

V: No! Martin Park in Florence. Please hurry...

O: Hold on. I have a Florence officer here with me. I'll put him on.

Florence Officer Brown: Okay, sir. Can you tell me exactly where you are?

V: Martin Park. Across from the old Coffee baseball field.

F: You're in Coffee County? I'll transfer you.

V: No. I'm in Florence. In Lauderdale County. It's the park named for Mayor Martin.

F: Have you been taking any drugs, sir?

V: No. I'm having a heart attack!

F: The mayor's name is Bedderdown...or something like that...until next November. There's a heavy fine for prank calls.

V: That's okay. I see a Border Collie coming down the trail. I'll get it to drag me to my car and I can drive myself to NAMC. (Silence)

F: Hmmm. He hung up. Must have been drunk.



Pictured: Cory Richardson, District 3 Candidate


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