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In what the Wall Street Journal is calling a brilliant financial coup, the uber popular Sheffield watering hole Skankie's has purchased the Drunken Brass Monkey in Florence. According to insiders, Skankie's practically stole the club in what real estate moguls call a shooting sale. This is apparently like a fire sale, but in which the property is riddled with bullets rather than torched.
Said general manager Blake Aycock, "We absolutely jumped on the deal. Our main concern was whether to call the new dive "The Drunken Brass Skanky" or "Skankies North." We went with Skankies North so as not to dilute our established months old brand." Will there be any changes to the format? "You betcha! The new cover policy is bikers free, gays only $1.00, and hookers a crisp C note, or maybe trade - call me. Second, we're pretty sure we can do better than DJ Snix out of Marion County. We're going whole hog to get DJ Sux from Frog Pond in Franklin."
There you have it, folks. Be sure to keep up with the continued adventures of Skankie's in the Shoals News Source.
Note: The blog Shoalanda Speaks does not own the fictional characters of Skankie's or Blake Aycock, nor does anyone who works here write for the Shoals News Source.
Sounds to me like you are a very insecure person attacking others to feel better about yourself. That was a horrific act of violence and you are adding fuel to the fire with your incorrect facts about an establishment. You put down gays, Snix and bikers why? They are people too. I know the kid that was shot, the owner, and am best friends with Snix. All are good people including I'm sure the other people in that club that night that could have been hurt. You are more concerned with them rather than the shooter which is absolutely ridiculous. I think you honestly need to work on liking yourself before you tear down other people. You need to find God and stop promoting hate through your vicious words!
ReplyDeleteFirst, NO gays were put down or ever will be in this blog. Nothing vicious was said. It's simply a work of satire that comes with the territory. It's not the first that has appeared in this blog, nor will it be the last.
DeleteI stand firmly by my above words. Not a satire but truth. You call it humor I call it hatful words caused by insecurity. Praying for you and your co-workers. :-)
DeleteBlake Aycock really exists. He was the gentleman who crashed his airplane at Muscle Shoals Airport a few years ago.
ReplyDeleteInteresting. Any idea why Shoals News made him the manager of Skankie's?
DeleteNo clue at all.
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