ZAR on PSS & Ricatoni's

 

We have a new missive from Uncle ZAR. Please cover your keyboard before you get to the part about UNA professors...

Dear Ms. Shoalanda,

Conditions continue to be harsh up here on the ridge. I hope this letter finds you well.

I've been doing a lot better ever since I got sober. For some reason I thought my insides needed to be sanitized.

After I became a regular at the downtown protest my friends decided it was time to hold an intervention. I just thought it seemed like a good place to find a girlfriend. I promise you that I won't be going back after this past Saturday night.

I thought it was wonderful that the city finally took the right steps to officially record their desire to have the monument moved. At the beginning of the meeting I was told that action "means nothing to you." I thought to myself, well, if it means nothing to me why in the heck am I here.

So I marched myself right out of the cold and into my car. I did stop on the way home and got myself a sack of Krystal's.

I never really understood why the Italian Restaurant on Court Street was being protested anyway. I admit I am more of a Chef Boyardee from the gas station kind of guy these days, but back in the day I did frequent that establishment quite a bit for some serious wining and dining.

How did the man from the Channel 15 tv commercials become a comic book super villain in this story? I understand that if your desire is to be a superhero you have to have a foe. But seriously, who knows!?

Someone did tell me that if the monument gets moved soon after the November 3rd election they will still have time to enter the Cannes Film Festival. I told my niece they may just have to settle for the George Lindsey Film Festival next year.

She is afraid that tuition will be raised again at the end of this semester. Something about wanting to set-up a special fund for professors who need counseling after the election.

I am just so glad that I voted weeks ago. I really do think Jo Jorgensen will probably win. I always vote for any candidate who puts their nickname on the ballot. If they have a nickname someone has to like them.

By the time you receive this letter I will have already retreated into my bunker. I won't surface until around the middle of November, but don't worry I still plan on coming to Thanksgiving dinner.

Also, don't be too freaked out to hand out candy to the kiddos on Halloween this year. After all it is the one time of year that everyone wears a mask.


Your good bud,

Zachariah Appleton Remusall